Level? In what Universe!

[Cabinetman]

So we are on Holiday in Florida staying in a hotel till the rest of the crew arrives. Wonderful to leave the bitter cold behind
This is the inside of the wardrobe, the first photo is taken with me being really careful to hold the phone level, the second shows the corner of the wall and the disparity- about 4” out of plumb over 6’6”. Just what was he on?
Also being this type of shelving the shelves are using different holes to try to level up the shelves, all the uprights are parallel so presumably his level was way out.

 

[fuse]

I got a bargain spirit level from a poundshop once upon a time.
I was putting down shuttering for a concrete shed base and upon re-checking found a couple of boards were out.
Checked again and some were fine
Check again and others were level again but the good ones were off now.
Readjusted and rechecked and readjusted for a good 15mins

I would have ended up making wicker baskets at the psychiatric unit but then I tried the level on the kitchen worktop and got two different readings by reversing the orientation.
The vials were set in a few degrees out.

 

[Richard]

That maybe falls into the 'Fits where it touches, which may not be many places, but where it touches, it fits' category. Slainte.

 

[Sheffield Tony]

I wonder if the builder who did our kitchen extension had the same spirit level. The floor is 30mm lower at one end than the other. I wondered why the cabinets are standing on blocks at the far end, out of the adjustment range of the legs. Actually I suspect they got their sums wrong on the concrete order and couldn't be bothered to rectify it.

 

[Cabinetman]

Haha, yes been there. But you’d think that at some point he would stand back and look at his work? This is so far out it’s crazy.

 

[Alasdair]

In 2016 We bought a new house (my ex wanted a brand new house) walking around on the first day the stairs felt wrong so I raised it with the agent (I was two weeks post surgery at this point after having lost someting in the region of 80% of my blood volume through a burst varicose vein - scary time). As it was mid afternoon , we were moving and I was tired I asked the agent to call back next day as he swore there was nothing wrong with the stairs. Next morning I dug out the trusty levels and checked across the first of the kite winder steps, 40mm drop from the newel post on the left to the stringer on the right and from the nose at the stringer to the back of the step another 23mm drop. i showed this to teh site agent and we agreed he should call the joiner back. Two days later a very unhappy and aggresive joiner appeared at my door with the agent demanding to know why he was there and asking if we 'had a problem, pal'. i politely told him no 'we' don't have a problem the problem was all his and showed him the stairs. He then proceeded to tell me that "as these are whats know as 'kite winder' (insert air quotes here) stairs they aren't actually off the level, it's an optical illusion. Do you know what one of them is' pal". i assured him that i was aware of optical illusions and before I could say anything else he said "good you understand then" while stepping forward and pushing his face right up to mine. I proceeded to tell him that I understood that he had just stood in my house and spoke the biggest load of shite that I had heard in a long time and that he should take himself and his horse which was now doubt parked outside and leave before I threw him out. Change of direction from the big man at that point as he turne to the site agent and said wait is this plot 87 which the agent confirmed it was and he said "ahh that explains it then". Eventually curiosity got the better of me and i had to ask "explains what?". He then went into a long explanation that he remembered this plot as its the one where he had the stairs sitting in all level when the plumber walked in carrying the toilet and walked up the stairs and as they weren't fixed dropped off the level. I asked the obvious why if he had witnesed this did he not relevel before fixing and his response was "I only get paid to level once". I still threw him out and had to go to legal threats wth the builder to get it fixed.

 

[AndyP]

I’m sure that not many would have had the balls to stand up to him like that.

 

[Alasdair]

Been in the trade too long, heard all the excuses and met many guys like him. Aand i just couldn't be bothered arguing with him

 

[Eric the Viking]

... I still threw him out and had to go to legal threats wth the builder to get it fixed.

Been there, sort-of.

Our staircase is one of the features of the house that people remark on when they first come in. It's roughly square, and has an 8' wide x 11' tall window. As you might imagine, this was fitted twice, the second time with a lot of grumbling and recourse to the manager/"quality inspector". Threatening not to pay the bill did focus attention however.

I have two pet hates with tradespeople:

• Firstly I have never yet seen anyone, unprompted, checking a level at the house here (and yes, I will prompt them!).
• Secondly there is a universal untruth, held as gospel by many, that the longer the level, the more accurate it is.
• And thirdly (OK, this one's freebie), that all levels arrive, beautifully accurate from the factory, via the container ship, via the distributor's trunker, via the display stand at the counter in ToolFix, into the loving arms of a tradesperson.

To be honest the same goes for laser levels of all descriptions and brands (unless you're paying for a Leica or similar with an individual certificate).

Some years ago I made a water level, which uses garden hose and a couple of short bits of rigid, clear tube. It's a right PITA to use, but accurate to about 1.5mm over whatever length you run it out to. It's not necessary for adjusting a spirit level -- you only neeed an almost-level bench or worktop for that -- but it's proof you can have pretty extreme accuracy without spending any dosh.

 

[Eric the Viking]

By the way, has anyone recently seen an adjustable, 2-foot spirit level, at a sensible price?

I use a Stanley, bought on-sale in Acton in 1984*. It's still correct, end-to-end, as it's adjustable, but it's not flat along the bottom edge any more (stupid boy, you leant it out!!). I would love to replace it with something that is straight, but everything I've seen sub 80 quid has a fixed bubble.

*Cycling back to Ealing with it under my arm was 'interesting'.

 

[Alasdair]

Water levels were great but sadly no one uses anymore thaks to the indisputible red or green line which many only have half an idea on how it should be used

 

[Eric the Viking]

I have a green laser, but can't remember the last time I used it for actual levelling.

Have you noticed how every sales-brochure for them involves someone (without work gloves on) standing well back to admire the glowing "X"?

They're not getting up close and personal with a pencil trying to mark the wall without interrupting the beam, or trying to nudge the stand up by 2.5mm.

Actually I can remember: I surveyed the subsidence of our hall floor, for which it worked excellently (on a dumpy microphone stand). Then we went on holiday, and while we were away, a Very Nice Man came and put it right!

 

[Alasdair]

i knew a lift engineer who was telling me that the lift company he worked for had taken the plumb bobs and piano wire away from the engineers and had given them all lasers as they would be able to go further up a lift shaft with the laser (apparently they work to a plumb line in the centre of the shaft) and not have to account for any rotational swing, only problem he had was the laser dot 10 floors up was 20mm in diameter.